We have been to two weddings since we’ve been here. It’s hard to know exactly what’s going on during the ceremony; this time around I recognized a few words I have acquired, like love, man and woman. But I have learned a few things about Korean weddings.
There is not an RSVP included with the invitation. If you receive an invitation you are expected to attend. The workplace puts a lot of effort into bonding with coworkers so usually everyone at work is invited.
The vast majority of weddings are held in hotels or venues made specifically for weddings. I have never heard of one in a church, but I suppose it could happen. They are always super busy on the weekends. The couple is allowed a certain amount of time (an hour or so) because the next wedding is ready and waiting. Everyone who gets married that day has the same decor. I don’t know how often the decorations are changed out.
Before the wedding the bride takes photos in a little room to the side. People can go in a greet her.The groom and the parents are available out front to give congratulations and well wishes to.Companies, the couples' and their parents', will send these large flower arrangements.The Koreans in general like to take a ton of pictures. I am a fan of that because I do, too. In keeping with that, their bridal portraits are not just for the bride, but the couple. They get to wear several different outfits and take super cute photos together.
The mothers of the bride enter on a raised catwalk in the center of the room.
Finally the daddy walks the bride down the isle. At the end they are greeted by the mothers and the groom. Here the groom is giving the sweetest hug to his future father-in-law.
None of the weddings we attended had bridesmaids nor groomsmen. The brides and grooms wore what we would consider typical wedding attire. The mothers and older family members (grandmas and aunts) wear traditional hanboks. The mother of the groom usually wears light blue and the mother of the bride wears a shade of pink. I have read that it is tradition that the groom presents the bride's parents with a goose. Geese mate for life so this is symbolic for their future marriage, and a promise of love and care for their daughter. A live goose was originally given, but it is often a wooden duck now. I haven't been close enough to see if that was the gift given or not but something was exchanged between the groom and parents.
After the ceremony pictures are taken while everyone sits and watches. There are typical family pics.The ceremonies have an MC announcing things. The first wedding had a couple live songs played. The second one had a video of the couple singing a sing along with pictures of them.
At the end, the coworkers all go take pictures with the couple.
After a serious picture, they all did the 'heart' hand sign for the girl who caught the bouquet. The chosen girl gets pulled to the front so only she can catch it.
This wedding the photographer had everyone pull out their cell phones and turned off the lights. It was a very cute picture.
As soon as the work picture is taken everyone goes down to a banquet hall for the reception. The couple may change into traditional hanbok outfits at this point. The bride wears red/pink and the groom wears blue. The colors are like yin and yang; the blue yin represents healing and relaxation, while the yang red symbolizes enthusiasm and active energy.The first wedding was mind-boggling with the amount of buffet tables! As an attendee you are expected to bring an envelope with cash as a gift. As a thank you the happy couple provides a meal. The second wedding we attended was slightly different because, covid. Abe’s boss requested we not attend the reception; many other people were wary of eating with such a large group as well. When you gave your envelope of cash you received a ticket to either attend the reception or get a gift. Since we didn’t enjoy a meal, the couple gave us parting gifts. Abe, Daisy and I attended; we were expected to give three gifts so we received three gifts.
Whenever you take vacation time from work it is expected that you will bring a gift back for your co-workers. The idea is that they had to take up the slack and cover for you when you were gone. Koreans are thoughtful and intentional with gift giving. Here is the wedding gift Abe and his counterparts received once the groom returned from their honeymoon.
[November 21]
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